A... Stressed... Head...!

Hello!

I know I'm lazy with my posts, but I recently started up a calendar! I'll be posting (hopefully) every Sunday!! 
My head has been super duper stressed out lately - from school work, creative blocks, procrastination, secrets, bodily functions... Oh boy, there's nothing going on in my life but somehow my brain is changing every thought to create a big, scary, thought storm. I'm honestly ready to burst, starting from my head!

It's come to the point where thoughts actually, physically make my brain hurt. So here are a few things going on in my head; right now! Warning, it's long! But, I really plead for some advice, if any :3

• SCHOOL WORK

Basically it's a huge muddled mess that I'm actually staying on top of... My favourite subject is math, and we're doing trigonometry and I love it! Although I'm quite embarrassed to say so.

• CREATIVE BLOCKS

I'm really trying hard to think of new post ideas and story ideas, and they're coming so slow, I feel dead inside...

• PROCRASTINATION

I'm just a huge procrastinator and it's greatly impacting my life in horrific ways.

• BODY

Recently, at my job, I wasn't feeling well, but I worked through it and didn't sit out - which was a PAIN. I didn't think anything of it, but when I got home, I found out I'd gotten my first period!! It's really scary, actually, blood gushing out of you every few minutes. I've had to brave this shit for 6 days. 6 DAYS!!! Ugh, everything is a struggle, from sitting to standing and having it gush everywhere, from clothes being ruined, from having to change the dirty, smelly nappy thing and try to be quiet in public bathrooms, cramps and cravings. Hey, at least I've become a woman!!

• SEXUALITY

Recently, it has come to my attention that I find girls quite attractive. But, I'm still fixated on boys. And my mind changes pretty quickly, too. One minute, I'll be thinking about whether I'd go out with a girl, and as soon as I accept it, I think, ew - not for me... And I find it very very frustrating that every few minutes I've changed my mind on whether I like girls or not. And it doesn't help that I'm crushing on a guy, so I'm always wondering. Help! I've taken quizzes, looked at forums. Maybe I'm just bi-curious. But I don't know...

• A BIG SECRET

Recently I discovered a huge family secret. I discovered that I could be moving - half way across the world. And whilst that country is one of my favourites in the world, I feel guilty.

This year I discovered my best friends, the ones I really want to never, ever leave my side. I love them so, so much. I feel really guilty when I think about the possibility (though quite small, but still existent!!) of me moving, but I just can't help but feel excited.

I would miss them so much; but I really want to move out of this tiny town, and begin a real life with real opportunities that you'd never get where I live. I've just never had to make new friends before, so this is gonna be tough (if I actually go)

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Thank you so much for listening, I'm sorry some of the subjects are a bit taboo. Hey, that's what this anon feature is for! Feel free to email me (see contact page) if you have anything to talk about :)

Just a Girl, signing off xx